Was born today. Bizarre feeling – like nothing I’ve experienced before. Not one I’ll be repeating in a hurry, that’s for sure. Was given a small blue rabbit, which seemed rather incongruous in such a plain white spartan hospital.

Everything seems quite exciting and new, though I was briefly held in front of a mirror and discovered that I am extremely small and very ugly. Oddly most people around me seem to think I’m the most amazing, beautiful thing in the world. This is not true, and is one of many things that I find difficult to understand.

I attempted to ask people to explain things to me, but I only succeeded in making a kind of gurgling sound, which was most unsatisfactory. Resolved to work on speaking coherently. My wardrobe also seems very limited, currently comprising only one item which appears to be little more than a towel.

Most definitely things need to change. There is work to be done here.